Do you ever wonder why people do not understand what you are saying? Why the people you speak to do not move in the direction that is clearly best for them? Why your children seemingly ignore your wishes? One problem could be that you are not wearing your “audience goggles.”

Ok, so maybe you can’t go to Walmart and buy a pair of audience goggles. However, realizing the need to see things through the eyes of the people you are communicating to is important. It does not matter whether you are a marketer looking for a consumer or a mother teaching your child.

As cheesy as it may be, 99.9% of the people you meet listen to their favorite radio station “Wii fm” (What’s In It For Me?).  It does not always mean that they are being selfish, it is just the way humans are wired.  We are born with the instinct to think of ourselves first.

Very often we try to communicate reasons why we want people to do things.  In actuality we end up telling people why WE want them to do it.  The best way to communicate effectively is to tell them why THEY will want to do it.  I can tell my five-year old boy all day long that I want him to clean his room because I’m tired of looking at the mess, but that won’t really work.  He ultimately does not care what I am tire of.  What he really needs to hear is that HE should want to clean his room because once he is finished, we can go outside and play football.

Many businesses have the same problem.  A photographer may tell people he takes pictures.  While that is true, is that why his client hires him?  No, they hire him because they want to remember that particular event their whole lives, and be able to pass those memories on to future generations.

Anytime you are trying to convey a message to someone, try to look through the eyes of the person you are trying to reach.

It has been said that a mouse only has two thoughts: Avoid cats and get cheese.  I do not really know if that is true since I have never studied mice.  It sounds about right, so I will go with it.  Getting cheese is an important thing to a mouse.  If the mouse operated under the fear of the cat only though, he would never get any cheese.  He would not leave his home.  He would starve to death.  He realizes however, that in order to obtain the cheese he so rightly desires, he has to shift out of the fear mindset.

 Via Aaron Levy

The way I see it there are three basic ways to stop operating under fear.  Only after you have shifted out of the fear gear can you pursue your goals.

1. Acknowledge that the fear is real.  We all have fears.  I do not always like to admit it, especially around my wife or kids, but it is true.  If you ignore the fear or act like it does not exist, you will likely be paralyzed by it.
2. Realize that fear is not the best way.  Fear can be a motivating factor in getting started.  It can motivate you to move forward.  The problem is that fear only motivates you to survive.  If it does not change forms into something more motivating, you will likely not take the leap forward to success.  Do not get stuck in survival mode.
3. Change the way you think.  It is not always easy to change your thinking, but it is necessary for success.  We spend a good deal of our lives being limited.  We are constantly being told that we can not do something.  Through all of this, it is important to stay positive.  I am often tempted to say things over and over to myself like, “I will not operate under fear.”  While that does not seem all that bad, it is not all that good.  It would be the same as saying, “Don’t think of a pink elephant wearing giant glasses.”  What are you thinking of?  Did the picture in your mind resemble the picture above?  I bet it did.  Instead, I think the saying should be, “I am going to operate out of abundance.”

What do you fear?  How can you change your thinking and speech to avoid operating under fear?