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The Three Steps to Stop Operating Under Fear

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It has been said that a mouse only has two thoughts: Avoid cats and get cheese.  I do not really know if that is true since I have never studied mice.  It sounds about right, so I will go with it.  Getting cheese is an important thing to a mouse.  If the mouse operated under the fear of the cat only though, he would never get any cheese.  He would not leave his home.  He would starve to death.  He realizes however, that in order to obtain the cheese he so rightly desires, he has to shift out of the fear mindset.

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 Via Aaron Levy

The way I see it there are three basic ways to stop operating under fear.  Only after you have shifted out of the fear gear can you pursue your goals.

  1. Acknowledge that the fear is real.  We all have fears.  I do not always like to admit it, especially around my wife or kids, but it is true.  If you ignore the fear or act like it does not exist, you will likely be paralyzed by it.
  2. Realize that fear is not the best way.  Fear can be a motivating factor in getting started.  It can motivate you to move forward.  The problem is that fear only motivates you to survive.  If it does not change forms into something more motivating, you will likely not take the leap forward to success.  Do not get stuck in survival mode.
  3. Change the way you think.  It is not always easy to change your thinking, but it is necessary for success.  We spend a good deal of our lives being limited.  We are constantly being told that we can not do something.  Through all of this, it is important to stay positive.  I am often tempted to say things over and over to myself like, “I will not operate under fear.”  While that does not seem all that bad, it is not all that good.  It would be the same as saying, “Don’t think of a pink elephant wearing giant glasses.”  What are you thinking of?  Did the picture in your mind resemble the picture above?  I bet it did.  Instead, I think the saying should be, “I am going to operate out of abundance.”
Operating under the assumption of abundance is knowing that there is so much of what you are looking for out there, you have no doubt that you will obtain your goal.   I know it is just words, but the difference in just a few words can rocket you from paralyzed fear to abundant success.

What do you fear?  How can you change your thinking and speech to avoid operating under fear?

Why You THINK You Are Not Good Enough

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It is very exciting when you come across something that you really love.  Something that you have passion for.  Something that gets you excited when you wake up in the morning.  It is even more exciting when you get the opportunity to do that thing for a living.

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The problem for many people is they do not take the opportunity to do their passion for their career.  They do not take the opportunity because they believe they are not good enough.  There are many reasons why people do not think they are good enough.  Sometimes it is because that is what their peers have told them.  Parents and loved ones can deliver serious blows to your ego.  The possibilities could go on an on.

The issue that has hindered me the most in my life is comparing myself to the other people I see.  The fact is that when you really enjoy something you surround yourself with it.  Growing up I always loved playing soccer.  I still love playing soccer.  I also like watching soccer.  Now unless my kids are playing I do not stop at the local park and watch 8 year olds play soccer.  I watch the world cup, major league soccer, or college soccer.

When you love something, you surround yourself with the best of it.  People who like music listen to the top musicians.  People love to paint look at the paintings of the best painters in the world.  Chances are that you are comparing yourself to someone in the top 1% of your passion.  What you are forgetting is that you know more about your passion than most of the world.  You are better than the other 99%.

It is good to keep your eyes on the best.  It is good to know what the best are doing.  It is good to have goals that stretch you.  It is NOT good to allow your eyes on the best to paralyze you into doing nothing.

Now that you know you are good enough, what are the ways that you ARE good enough?

Are You in Beta Testing?

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Beta testing is when a piece of software or a website is launched, but is still under testing.  If you are reading this blog, you have been launched.  So, the question that remains is: Are you under testing?

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It is pretty safe to say that you are always under testing.  Life has a way of making sure that there are always hardships in our lives.  Everybody you meet is going through some sort of difficulty.  (It would help us all to remember that the next time someone cuts you off on the highway.)  How you deal with the testing is the key.

Beta testing does not help if nobody knows about the beta testing.  The main key to a successful beta test is for the people using the product to provide feedback.  You must acknowledge the fact that you are in beta testing, or nobody will give you feedback.  I was in a class the other day where we were talking about personal improvement.  I asked the question if they were still doing things to increase their learning.  One guy told me that he had already been through school and that his education was over.  I could not believe that someone actually had that mind-set.  How can you ever make a better you, if you are not acknowledging the fact that there is room for improvement?

Beta testing requires you to listen and respond.  It will not profit you one little bit if you launch the beta version, acknowledge you are in beta testing, and then fuse to listen and respond to the lessons being taught.  If there is a glitch in your website that keeps people from buying your product, you want to know about it.  Once you find out, I would suggest fixing it immediately.  It is not always easy to hear that you messed up, but it is necessary to know.  Once you know, it is even more important to respond to it by adjusting and fixing the issue.

Beta testing should be a life long process.  The apps on my iphone and ipad update constantly.  Sometimes it takes longer than I want.  Sometimes the ‘improvements’ are not that much help.  Other times the new version has better features, is easier to use, functions faster, and is just better over all.  The key is that they are working to be better.  If you are not moving forward, you are moving backward.

Are you in beta testing?  Do you acknowledge your need for beta testing?

Thermostat or Thermometer?

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In my kitchen, I have an old thermometer. It looks like it is a hundred years old (the picture below is it). It is definitely useful. I like to know what the temperature is.

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Also, in my house I have a thermostat. It is more useful to me. It not only tells me the temperature, it regulates it.

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So which are you, a thermostat or a thermometer?

A thermometer is always ready to tell you what is wrong. It shrieks out with its vivid red to tell you just how hot or cold it is. The issue is that it stops there. It does not give you suggestions on how to change things. It does not care if you try to make things better or not. It just gives the facts.

I have been a thermometer too many times in my life. I do not have any issues with telling people how they are wrong. I am happy to point out all of the problems there are with their ideas. It is definitely much easier to be a critic than it is to be a creator. What the world needs more of is NOT critics. The world needs more thermostats.

A thermostat, which is about the same size as a thermometer, is wired to give direction. It leads other devices in regulating the temperature in an area. It tells the furnace to pump out heat because it is too cold. It delegates authority to the air conditioner to cool the house down.

The next time you see a problem or an issue, remember these pictures. Are you going to just complain about the problem? Are you going to yell at the top of your lungs to alert everyone who can see you what the issue is? I think it will be much more profitable to come up with a solution. Sometimes you may be able to solve the problem yourself. Sometimes you may need to seek counsel for help. Other times you may be able to delegate the solution to a competent person around you.

The key is that you are willing to implement the change necessary.

What are some ways you can be a thermostat?

 

 

I’m Smarter Than That Guy!

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Successful people only use common sense principles to obtain their success. I have heard it a million times. In fact, I have said it a few times myself. “There is no way that guy is successful, I’m smarter than him.

Common Knowledge Café

I heard Ivan Misner say, “Success in the uncommon application of common knowledge.” I have found that to be true in recent years. I used to think there is no way I could <insert anything you want to do in here>. The truth is, I can do most anything I want to do. You can too. All it takes is applying the basic principles that even my seven year old knows.

That sounds so easy. I know there are still going to be obstacles. There are still going to be times where it may seem impossible. It is easier to be critical than successful. However, in just a few easy steps, you can accomplish most anything you want.

  1. Break down the task into several easy steps. I had a goal to have a blog. It seemed to be impossible to do, because I wanted it to be as good as Michael Hyatt’s blog. What I did not realize at first was that Michael Hyatt’s blog was not as good when he started it, as it is now. So I broke the process down into easy to accomplish tasks. (buy a domain, set up a blue host account, install wordpress, create a wordpress account, and start writing stuff)
  2. Do NOT fear failure. “Anything worth doing, is worth doing badly.” It is the ultimate goal to do things great, but the first time you do anything it will be bad. Just look at a child learning to walk for the first time. That kid is going to fall, a lot.
  3. Schedule time. The only things that will get done in your day, are things that are scheduled. If you do not set time aside to do the things you need to do, you will end up watching a marathon of The Mentalist on TV. (I may have done this one before?!) It doesn’t matter how much time you have. Use what you have to the fullest. You will not regret it.
  4. DO IT! Nike has this part right. Now it is time to just start knocking things off the task list. Do one task at a time. Only think in long range goals during the planning process. Once you move to the DO IT! stage, just think in terms of getting the next thing done.

Everyday, I am making a conscience effort to move forward, and get better. I want you to do the same thing. I know that the goals that you have, can be accomplished. Now get out there and DO IT!

Have you ever thought you were smarter than successful people? What are the things that they do that you should be doing?

How Many Loaves and Fishes Do You Have?

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This headline comes from a lesson in the Bible commonly referred to as the feeding of the five thousand. In this story, a small boy from the crowd offers his five loaves and two small fishes to Jesus so that the five thousand plus people who were there could eat.

Cinco pães e dois peixes

It sounds pretty impossible. In our own power, it maybe. However this young lad displayed several attributes that made it possible for his small amount of food to be used of God to help thousands of people.  Here are five attributes that this boy showed, that we can all learn from.

  1. Be Prepared  There were five thousand men present at this teaching.  That did not count the women and children.  Out of all of these people present, only this boy had food to eat.  It is so important for us to be prepared.  One of the best ways to be prepared is to be educated.  There are so many ways to learn today it is crazy.  Information can be found on websites, through blogs, podcasts, ebooks, audio books, actual paper books (WHO KNEW THEY STILL EXISTED?!), and I could go on and on.  There is simply no reason for each one of us to stop learning in this day and age.
  2. Do Not Take What You Have For Granted  If you are like me, the things you do are just the things you do.  You do not always find value in those things.  The boy ONLY had five loaves and two small fishes.  There was NO WAY it would be enough to feed all of those people.  That boy saw the value in what he had.  He realized what he had was important.  I know I need to get better at that.  My guess is that you need to as well.
  3. Speak Up  As the disciples went around to see what food was available, it would have been very easy for the boy to stay silent.  I mean, he was just a boy.  Like I said in point two, he only had a small amount of food.  Fortunately for everyone there, those things did not stop him.  He was not afraid to speak up.  Just like that boy, you need to speak up.  It may be that you see something that nobody else sees.  You might have knowledge on a subject that nobody else knows.
  4. Give It Your All  This boy could have easily kept a couple of loaves for himself.  He could have thought, if I give them all my food, they will give it to others.  I will have nothing for myself!  He did not do that.  He gave everything he had.  You and I need to put everything we have on the table, and not hold anything back.  By holding your best back, all you do is deprive the world of things that could change the world.
  5. Accept The Blessing  Due to the unselfishness of this boy, many people were able to eat until they were full, himself included.  Many people have a difficult accepting blessings.  This boy had no problem eating until he was full.  There is a good chance that he actually ate more than he brought.  It does not have to make sense.  When somebody wants to give you something, be thankful and accept it.

What are some other attributes that this boy showed?  

Why Comfort is NOT a Good Thing

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I do not like to leave my comfort zone.  At the risk of sounding redundant, it makes me uncomfortable.  It does not feel right!  The problem is, I know that leaving my comfort zone is the only way to get better.

When I started my blog, it was a step out of my comfort zone.  In my blog I put my thoughts out there for the world to see.  The scary part is someone might disagree with me.  Somebody may think that I am unoriginal.  People may not read my blog.  All of that does not matter.  No two people, no matter how similar, agree on anything.  There is nothing new under the sun, so of course your ideas will be based on something else you have learned in life.  I do not write my blog exclusively to get people to read it.  I do it for myself, but it is still nice for others to read.

Everything in your life that is worth having came with pain.  Think about it.  If you ever excelled in sports, there were many days of painful practice to get there.  If you have ever lost a significant amount of weight, there was lots of blood, sweat, and tears to get to your goal weight.  For the ladies out there, having a child was likely one of the most painful experiences of your life.  And it did not stop there, did it?  If you have ever made a large purchase, you had to work hard for the cash to buy it.  The list is endless, but the point is true, GROWTH does not occur without some level of pain.

Here are two reasons why I am going to step out of my comfort zone.

  1. To Provide Excitement – When I do the same thing over and over and over I may get a little better at that one thing.  I will not stay interested though.  I will get bored.  I want to get out of bed everyday excited to experience something that I did not have the chance to experience yesterday.
  2. To Make Myself Better – If I am not willing to try new things, I will never learn anything new.  And when you stop learning, you start dying.  I had an old guy I used to work with say he was never going to retire because people who retire die.  I know what he was saying, and for him if he was not at work, he would stop learning.  That would ultimately lead to his death.

I am committing now to start advertising my blog more.  I am going to start posting my blog on facebook and twitter.  I am going to put my website blog on my email signature.  I am going to take a bigger step out of my comfort zone because like the top of the page says, “It doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to be.”

When was the last time you stepped out of your comfort zone?  How did it turn out?

5 Reasons to Write Goals Down

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Most of my early life I hated writing things down.  I fought hard to avoid any kind of writing.  It is humorous that now I wish I had more time to write things down.  I enjoy writing now.  As I get older I realize more and more how important it is to write things down.

via gregwake, Flickr

One of the most important things you can write down are your goals.  In previous posts, I have told you the areas of life to set goals and I told you how to make them SMART goals.  In this post, I want to give you 5 reasons why I write down my goals.

  1. So I do not forget them.  I make sure to carry a pen and piece of paper with me everywhere I go.  I do this largely because I never know when I might get an idea that I don’t want to forget.  I am sure to write it down and keep it with me until I get to my moleskine notebook to properly record it.
  2. To make them real.  Until I write something down, it is just an idea.  It has no substance.  It has no plan.  Once I write it down, I can start working on a process to make it happen.
  3. To make myself believe it.  I spoke to a great artist the other day about her plan to start a new business.  I told her that I thought it was a great idea.  One of the issues she had been that she didn’t really think that she was great artist.  It seems like this is a common occurrence.  People take for granted the things that they are good at, because that is just what they do.  By writing a goal down, I can let it start sinking into my head that it is possible, and I am good enough.
  4. To see progress.  By writing my goals down I can see not only where I am going but where I have come from.  I can see things on my list that I have accomplished.  I can know that I am, in fact, making progress.
  5. To make it worth fighting for.  If I believe in something enough to write it down, I am a lot more likely to fight through resistance to accomplish it.  It is easy to quit these days.  It is easy to come up with excuses to stop pursuing goals.  Fighting for something is not easy.  Writing it down contributes to the conviction in me to stay strong in my pursuit.

Some of the goals in my life that I have accomplished are:  marrying a good Christian woman, having children, seeing my children saved, owning a home, and to lose 60 pounds.  I trust that if you too write your goals down, it will help.

Do you write your goals down?  What are some additional reasons why you do so?

8 Areas Where You Need To Set Goals

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My last post dealt with the importance of having SMART goals.  Today, I would like to give you 8 areas where you need to set goals.

via .Jac.’s photostream

This list may not include every area where you have goals, but these are the major areas that I have identified in my own life.  Some of these areas obviously overlap, when in doubt put them in every category they apply.  The more you write them down, the more cemented in your heart they will become.

  1. Spiritual Goals– My relationship with God is the most important area of my life.  Every area of my life flows through this area.  It is my belief that God given goals will not conflict.  Therefore, I feel this is the very first place to start creating goals.  The very first spiritual goal that I believe everyone should be saved and to have a close and personal relationship with God.  After this, some goals may involve Bible reading, prayer, Ministries in your church, and donating time and/or money to an outreach or mission.
  2. Family Goals– One family goal that I had is to see my two children become saved.  I am blessed to have seen that already, and at a young age.  My next goal is to see them increase in the knowledge and understanding of God and for them to serve Him throughout their life.  Some other family goals may include: family devotions, vacations, having children, adopting children, providing opportunities to learn, buying a new house, and having set dinner times where everyone gets together.
  3. Career Goals– There are times when your company sets career goals for you.  This is a good start.  However, it is important to have your own goals surrounding your career as well.  Whether it be a promotion, increasing sales, improving systems, increasing reach, or improving profits, these goals are essential to not becoming complacent in the current position you hold.
  4. Financial Goals–  This a big one for most people.  Financial goals are the life the blood to goals in every category.  My first financial goal is to be debt free.  This goal, if you are not currently there is probably the first one you should have as well.  All other financial goals start with having the cash required to be free from financial constraints.  Other financial goals that you may have may be to set up a college fund for your children, buying a luxury item that you are not currently able to afford, to be able to give anonymous gifts to those in need, to invest your money in areas where it can grow, or to create residual income streams.
  5. Physical Health Goals–  It is said that you spend the first half of your life trying to create wealth to the detriment of your health, and the last half of your life using your wealth to regain your health.  Unfortunately, this is all too true for many people.  I hope to be able to keep my health while furthering my wealth.  These goals may look like eating properly, drinking more water, exercising 3-5 times per week, competing in a marathon or triathlon, or just beating your wife in a personal challenge to log the most miles in a month (I currently have this goal!).
  6. Learning Goals– I was having a conversation with a gentleman the other day who informed me that he had already been through high school and college, therefore he didn’t really need to learn anything else.  In my opinion this guy is destined for failure.  If you don’t have any goals in personal growth, development, and learning you can never improve any area of your life.  Now maybe he was just speaking to formal education, but I think this is a dangerous mindset to have.  Some of the learning goals I have are to read 2-3 non-fiction books per month, listen to personal development podcasts, read informative blogs, and attend conferences where I can learn new strategies for bettering myself.  Like showering, learning has to occur daily to be effective.
  7. Social Goals–  These goals would deal with how you interact with other people.  They could include your extended family, friends, co-workers, waitresses, and everyone else that you meet.  A social goal that I have is to leave every person I meet a little happier than they were when I met them.  Sometimes this is not possible.  All you can do is commit to it, carry it out everyday.
  8. Creative Goals–  Creative goals would be the goals that you have in whatever kind of art you enjoy.  Creativity can be used in any aspect of your life from work to recreation.  Whether you paint, play music, play football, write, build models, golf, or whatever it is that will lessen your stress, it is important to have goals.
Goals inspire you to carry on.  Goals help you feel you are moving forward.  Goals give your life additional purpose.  If you do not have a goal to move toward, you are not moving forward.  If you are not moving forward, you are moving backward.  So set your goals, then move toward them.
Are there other areas where you set goals?  What is your favorite area to set goals in?

 

SMART Goals

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A goal is the achievement toward which effort is directed. (via dictionary.com). That is pretty self-explanatory. You have an achievement that you want to reach, and you must exert effort to get there. Goals are an important part of successful people’s lives. Just having goals is not enough if they are not SMART.

via drewleavy

I trust that everyone reading this understands the importance of having goals. I have heard some say that they are content with what they have. They say they don’t really need goals. That is not content, that is complacent. It is possible to be content and still have BIG goals. Contentment vs. Complacency is a blog post for another day though. Today, I want to focus on having SMART goals.

There are several variations to this acronym out there, but this is the one that I have adopted as my own.

  • Specific. In the networking group I attend we have a saying, “Specific is Terrific”. It is a corny saying that we all laugh about. It is so true though. Having vague ideas of things that you want to do, will not get you to where you want to go. You have to have a vivid picture in your mind of what your goal looks like. You do not have to know everything that will happen to get you there. You just have to know what it is. Take it down to the smallest possible detail that you can.
  • Measurable. Now that you know specifically what you want to achieve, you need to make sure that you can measure how to get there. In every goal there are incremental landmarks that must be achieved along the way. Write those things down. A goal, mentally, is a lot easier to achieve if you write out all the measurable items that can get you there. For example do not say, “I need to save some money this month!”; say, “I am going to set aside $50 per week this month.”
  • Action-focused. Half of the definition of a goal is that you have to exert effort. You can not exert effort with out action. Quite frankly action does not happen for most people with out it being planned. So when you are writing out your goal, use ACTION words. Use words that inspire you to move forward. For example do not say, “I need to save some money this month!”; say, “I AM GOING to SET ASIDE $50 per week this month.”
  • Realistically Challenging. Realistic is sometimes a good excuse word for goal setting. I hear a lot that something is realistic when in fact, it is just challenging. It can be hard to know the difference. For the double amputee runner in the Olympics, it probably seemed unrealistic at some point in his life that he would be able to compete on the highest level of track and field. Obviously, that is not the case. It was just challenging. However, there are some things in life that are not realistic. I am short and almost 33 years old. I am not going to play in the NBA. That is NOT realistic. It is important that your goals be challenging, however. The only things worth achieving require some pain.
  • Time-bound. I know I procrastinate on things that do not have have a time limit. If your goals are not bound by time, you will procrastinate on them. Not only should your whole goal have time limits, but each step in your goal should have a time limit. If your time limit expires before you reach your goal, you have a decision to make. You need to decide if it is still a goal that you want to achieve. If it is, set a new time limit. If it is not, scrap it. I am sure that you were still able to learn things from the experience. Also, there is no better time to stop wasting time on something that does not matter like right now!

I have been working on my goal setting. One of the goals that I am focusing on right now is becoming debt free. That goal is NOT easy, but it is SMART.

I encourage you all to evaluate the goals you have to make sure they are SMART. If you do not have written goals, GO, DO IT NOW!!!

What goals do you have? What did you have to add to them to make them SMART?